Cabin Fever

It's barely the beginning of winter and here I am restless as all get out. Part of that may be that I haven't smoked a cigarette since Friday morning (God help the people around me for the next month...if the past 2 days are any indication, I am going to be a cranky wench). It rained all day yesterday, it's raining today, and dang it I just want to go outside for a while and enjoy the 70+ degree weather outside.

Things aren't happening as quickly as I want (as always I want everything RIGHT NOW), and I'm irritable because of it. That's not all of what's making me contrary, but I'm not ready to go into that at the moment. I'm ready for some sunshine, some outdoor activity, and some R&R. I cleared 90 hours at work in the past two weeks and I'm ready for something.....anything at this point to do other than clean the house and watch the rain fall all day. Football will be a minor distraction this afternoon.

I feel like I could zap someone with all this nervous energy running around in my head? I don't have a good outlet at the moment, I need to move but am paralyzed by the lack of a direction. I know, I know just pick one.

Ok, am going to clean something....at least it's accomplishing something with all this energy.

And the wheel keeps on turning

I'm posting this a few days early because I won't be near a computer until Thursday and that would be after the fact and completely pointless.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TANITH!!!!!!!

My baby girl will be 18 later on this week. So many things I want to say to her. So many things I don't know how to say. We spent yesterday playing Lazer-tag, riding go karts and bumper cars, and generally being silly. I will miss these days as she gets older, though I hope she keeps her ability to be crazy and zany at the drop of a hat. So I guess I will post a few things I want her to remember as her path through life as an adult officially begins.

1. The world can be scary, I know that you know this. Find your safe place and guard it fiercely.
2. Surround yourself with people who will cheer you on and hold you as accountable as you will hold them.
3. Be the friend you want, relationships should never be one-sided. 
4. Don't be afraid to dream, when you stop dreaming, you lose hope. Hope is a must have for life. 
5. Be compassionate. Try to put yourself in someone else's shoes if possible. Just because it's not the way you normally do things, does not make it automatically wrong. 
6. I am always here for you. Doesn't matter if it's for a hug, a sounding board, a vent, a safe place, whatever. I am always here for you. 
7. Life begins outside your comfort zone. Allow yourself to be uncomfortable every once in a while. 
8. When it comes to men (boys), remember what Dad and I have tried to show you. You know what your worth is, don't let a jerk take it away from you. 
9. Don't leave your siblings behind completely. I know that you are now in a different space and that you won't always get along, but you will cherish those relationships when you get older. 
10. Last but certainly not least. I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!! You have grown into a beautiful young woman in heart and mind. I cannot wait to see the direction you choose for you are capable of just about anything you set your mind to. Adversity is not an obstacle, it is a stepping stone. Don't intentionally seek it out, but embrace it when it comes because it means you are growing as a person.

Love you!!!

Fall madness

Fall is here. I do believe that it cooled off as quickly as it warmed up this summer. The AC is off and it's getting nice & chilly at night. Fall also signals the start of Marching season, football season, and homecoming parades for the girls. It has been a challenge in scheduling to say the least. Kyle has been the lifesaver in all of this and I am so glad that he's in a place with his job that he can step up and take care of the things I am unable to. 

Tomorrow is the Homecoming Parade for MCHS so I will get to watch it before I head back to Louisville to work, though I won't get to see the game. It's hard to believe that Tanith is a senior this year. Seems just like yesterday that she was 2 getting Easter pictures done in Amarillo. Sigh. 

Harlee is really coming into her own this year. It's so interesting to watch the kids figure out who they want be as they go through their teen years. She's more assertive and vocal about how people are. Makes for some interesting conversations here at home. 

A.J. though, he is a trip. For those that remember the nursery rhyme, "The girl with a curl in the middle of her forehead" comes to mind. He's definitely all boy and into everything. I think by the time it's all said and done, we'll have a percussionist in the house as well as the brass that the girls play. If he hears something with a beat, he can't stay still. The legs are jiggling, fingers are tapping, and the head is bobbing. It makes car rides very interesting, especially in my little Miata. 

October is going to be crazy busy. This weekend is Homecoming and the next 2 weekends after that are competition weekends. Kyle's sister is coming down as well and we are going to get to spend time with her & her family. Oct. 26th is Senior night, so Kyle and I will be standing with Tanith as she get's recognized. I'm going to have to find someone to man my camera for that night!

Mr. M gets the Drumline ready for the Exhibition in Clay county

Tanith conducting during warm-ups at Clay county

Beginning of the show before the salute to the judges

Harlee and the low brass line during warm-up

Learning curve

Wow! I can't believe it's been almost a month since I posted last.  Life has been very busy with the two oldest in Marching band, little man in school, and me at the new job.

Marching season is upon us again. The girls participated in their 1st exhibition yesterday. The band did well and it was a good opportunity to work out the bugs of the performance & get the nerves out of their system before next weekends double header competition. If you know me personally & I'm not available to talk for the next 6 wks, this is your heads up as to why lol.

Kyle has been holding down the fort while I work since he works in town. He picks up the girls from practice, works with the band parents at the concession stand, and is the go to person for every one it seems.  He makes it look easy when I know for a fact somedays you just want to tell everyone where they can go. So if you see him around, let him know what a great job he's doing =).

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Tuesday begins my 4th week at the new job and my 3rd week on the floor. I have discovered that I LOVE med/surg. I am always going. Granted, this may change as the rose colored glasses come off. But for the most part I'm pretty sure I've found my nursing home as far as specialties go.

There has been a huge learning curve when it comes to learning the policy & procedure of the company as well as learning my scope of practice according to the state of KY vs TN. Add that to learning charting software (Carelink for now w/ EPIC going live on 10/1), prioritization, and dealing with the pyxis system (I swear I have more sign-ons than a govt. agent!). Whew! I've been a busy girl =)

My preceptors and my educator have been awesome. I've made a few goofs (don't we all?), and they have been gracious & understanding.

I will say that I don't know that I have ever seen a company that walks it's talk as well as this one does. Every company I've worked for in the past usually had a huge disconnect between what the Administration wanted/needed and what the regular folks wanted/needed. With this company it's not like that. Again, this opinion might change once the rose colored glasses come off, but for now I definitely think I'm where I need to be.

 One secret of success in life is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes.                                                                                                                        - Benjamin Disraeli

Doors and Windows

A few months ago I posted about finishing nursing school. Tomorrow I begin the 1st day of my career, 2.5 hours from home. I submitted many resumes and applications that were an hour and a half or less of a commute from my house....nothing. Zip, zilch, nada. I try a little further out and tada! Job

I won't say that it wasn't discouraging not getting any bites. However, I knew that I would eventually end up where I needed to be. I just had to be still enough to listen. Apparently I was open enough to see the open window. I start with a large non-profit hospital system tomorrow. The application, resume, and interview process was painless. Voila! I now have a job. 

I have found over the years that if I stop fighting the process, I get better results. I let it come to me. Granted, some people would call that lazy, but think about it. Which is better? Expend a bunch of time and energy chasing something, and forcing it to be the way I think  it should be. Or? Letting the universe set up the opportunity and taking advantage of it. While I know that this is a very simplified view of things, I feel that my time and energy is better spent seeing the opportunities around me and taking advantage of them instead of trying to force something. 

Anyways, here's a toast to doors and windows and seeing the possibilities and opportunities that lie through them! 

Cheers!

Making Time

Every year we take a trip to Indiana to watch the Hydroplane boat races and spend time with family that we normally don't get to see. For the past 4 years we have been making a trip to Detroit, MI to watch the races up there the week after. Aside from getting to see some terrific boat racing, getting to see the family at both sights is the icing on the summer vacation cake.

Next year, if I can get it off (no job yet but working furiously towards that goal), I would like to add the San Diego race to that line up AND catch up with my really awesome cousin Chris over in Carlsbad (possibly convincing him & Amy to come to the race with us...hint hint lol). I've never been to California (Colorado is as far west as I've been so far)  and I would love to see that part of the country.

Life is always fleeting. I have come to realize that if I want to do the things I like & see the people I love, then I have to make the time to do so. In the end it's all about priorities. =)

I hope all of you are having a wonderful summer.

Mrs. Martin

What are we missing?

In a NY Times online article, the author, Tim Kriedle makes some very good points about the busyness in our lives. http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/06/30/the-busy-trap/?smid=fb-share

If we hopelessly run the rat race going from activity to activity, we miss out what life is about. Granted,  depending on where John Q. Public places his priorities says that I'm wrong on this but to each his own. I catch hell all the time for the activities that I didn't sign my kids up for or choose to do myself. It's not that I don't have the time, but it's not important to me to do X activity. There are many life lessons to be learned in the time that isn't filled with "stuff". While the human mind needs material to act as input, it also needs that unstructured time to come up with solutions (you know, if you stop thinking about it the answer comes to you phenomenon). 

The biggest thing about this article that caught my eye though, was the following quote, " They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or anxiety, because they’re addicted to busyness and dread what they might have to face in its absence." In today's world busyness indicates success, but it reminds me of the Ouroboros symbol (the serpent eating its own tail). The self is submerged into this vast ocean of human consciousness, but no one is taught how to be individual within that consciousness. 

When it's quiet and there is nothing pressing, that means we have to self reflect. Our insecurities come creeping up from the bottom of our self-consciousness and weasle their way into our self belief. As long as our lives are crammed with STUFF, we can justify our treatment of others as a part of the norm instead of looking back & saying " you know I really bit so and so's head off today & it wasn't their fault, I think I give them a call to apologize". Or to take it a step it step further and really look at our faults and proactively work to compensate for them. 

I know this blog probably is probably clear as mud right now. I guess the biggest thing I wanted to say about this article is that what Mr. Kriedle points out is very true....now I'm going to do what I need to do so I can stare at the clouds for the rest of the day. =)